Stop me if you've heard this before. Two of your top performers who started at the same time, knocked projects out of the park together, and have worked well as a team for many years, suddenly hit a roadblock. The relationship, for some reason, has deteriorated to the point where this former power duo now take great pains to avoid each other in hallways and speak only through third parties. When they do have to address each other for the sake of a project, things are tense and awkward and the rest of the team has become uncomfortable - or worse. They've begun to take sides.
Conflict is a given in any workplace. Sometimes your team will work it out for themselves, and sometimes you must step in and help manage the situation and pave the way towards a resolution. However, if you want to make things better, you've got to approach managing a conflict with an eye for objectivity.
If a conflict is getting out of hand and it has become apparent that you must step in to get everyone re-focused on their job, the best thing to do is hold a meeting behind closed doors - not a conference room with glass doors where curiosity seekers can walk by to see what's happening. Even if a conflict has become disruptive, the situation still requires sensitivity.
You might even consider taking the conversation off-site to a completely neutral location like a hotel meeting room, especially if the conflict involves high-level managers who might draw a lot of attention from curious employees.
Managing employee conflict isn't about refereeing, inserting your opinion, determining who is right or wrong, or demanding a resolution. You are simply there to facilitate the journey and keep everyone focused on the goal of moving forward.
Once you've got everyone together and you're ready to start airing things out, set some ground rules to maintain order - and keep yourself firmly planted in neutral territory. Make sure each person knows that when the other party has the floor, they should not talk. Assure them that each person will have time to air their issue, and equal time will be given to everyone. Also state very clearly for the record that you are not there to take sides, just facilitate the conversation.
When you're ready to get down to business, keep this list of do's and don'ts in mind to keep things fair, yet moving forward:
A conflict is successfully resolved if each person feels like they were treated fairly and gained something positive. There is nothing to be gained from taking sides. If an employee conflict just runs too deep for you to manage, there is no shame in stepping aside and making way for a professional mediator or consultant to take over and ensure that fairness prevails.